MEAN GIRL

OKAY FIRST OF ALL, WHERE OH WHERE WAS KATE BECKINSALE WHEN THE OSCAR RED CARPET NEEDED HER?? BECAUSE SHE SHOWED UP TO THE GOVERNOR'S BALL AFTERWARDS LOOKING LIKE THIS, WHICH WOULD HAVE CERTAINLY ENSURED HER THE NUMBER ONE SPOT ON MY BEST DRESSED LIST...

SECONDLY, WHAT SCHMUCK OUT THERE LEAKED THE STORY ABOUT PRINCE HARRY SERVING IN AFGHANISTAN?? THAT IS JUST WRONG ON SO MANY LEVELS. THE GUY GOES OFF TO ACTUALLY FIGHT IN THE REAL COUNTRY WE SHOULD BE AT WAR WITH, AND HIS COVER GETS BLOWN. SINCE THE STORY BROKE THEY HAVE, OF COURSE PULLED HIS DUTIES THERE TO PROTECT THE SAFETY OF HIM AND HIS UNIT. HASN'T THE KID BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH IN HIS LIFE?? LET HIM SERVE IN THE MILITARY AND FIGHT THE WAR WE SHOULD ACTUALLY BE FIGHTING BECAUSE HE ISN'T PRETENTIOUS ENOUGH TO BELIEVE THAT THE TITLE OF "PRINCE" MAKES HIM ANY BETTER THAN HIS FRIENDS AND FELLOW SOLDIERS. SCREW WHOEVER IT IS THAT BROKE THIS STORY AND LET HARRY AND WILLIAM TOO FOR THAT MATTER ACTUALLY LIVE THEIR LIVES THE WAY THEY CHOOSE TO.



AND FOR THE RECORD, YES I DO BELIEVE HARRY TO BE THE HOTTEST OF THE TWO. I CAN'T HELP IT.

HAVE Y'ALL SEEN THIS YET??

RACHEL BILSON. HER NEW BANGS ARE THE BOMB. IF I COULD PULL OF WEARING BANGS, THIS IS HOW I'D DO IT. IT'S FABULOUS.

SO MY FRIENDS, WE HAVE A PROBLEM. IT APPEARS THAT I HAVE SOME MAJOR COMPETITION FOR THE MAN OF MY DREAMS. APPARENTLY SCARLETT JOHANSSON HAS ANNOUNCED THAT SHE IS ENGAGED.



GOOD FOR HER, RIGHT??!! NOT SO MUCH SINCE SHE SAYS SHE IS ENGAGED TO MY MAN...

I'D SAY BARACK HAS SOME EXPLAINING TO DO!! HAHA :-)

IN CELEBRITY TRAINWRECK NEWS, LINDSAY LOHAN'S LITTLE SISTER ALI HAS DECIDED THAT HER BIG SIS IS SO TOTALLY AWESOME THAT SHE IS PLANNING TO FOLLOW IN HER FOOTSTEPS AND RECORD AN ALBUM AND DO SOME ACTING.

GOSH, THAT SURE DOES SOUND LIKE A GREAT IDEA TO ME. LA LOHAN IS THE PERFECT ROLE MODEL, YOU KNOW.

SHE'S FALLEN OFF THE WAGON TOO BY THE WAY. UNLESS SHE JUST ENJOYS FALLING DOWN OUTSIDE OF BARS IN THE WEE HOURS OF THE MORNING...



OH, AND BY THE WAY IT APPEARS PARIS HILTON IS NOW A HOMEWRECKER...

THIS IS THE OTHER BROTHER FROM GOOD CHARLOTTE. HE BROKE OFF HIS ENGAGEMENT TO HIS LONG-TIME GIRLFRIEND LAST WEEK. WONDER WHY??

IN EVEN MORE RANDOM CELEBRITY DEVELOPMENTS, THERE IS SPECULATION THAT ORLANDO BLOOM HAS GONE FROM DATING HER...

TO DATING HER...

BESIDES THE WORDS "ARE YOU JOKING?", "YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS!", AND "WTF" I REALLY HAVE NO COMMENT ON THIS PROPOSTEROUS TURN OF EVENTS.

MOVING ON, EVERYONE KNOWS THAT I HEART REALITY TV. WELL, IN ABSOLUTELY HORRIFIC AND DEVASTATING NEWS, MY BEAUTIFUL ALEX WAS EVICTED FROM THE BIG BROTHER HOUSE ON WEDNESDAY. I AM NOT TAKING THIS WELL.

I MEAN LOOK AT HIM!! WOULD YOU BE TAKING THIS WELL?? I THINK NOT!!

THE ONLY POSITIVE TO THIS AWFUL TURN OF EVENTS IS THAT THERE IS APPARENTLY A HUGE BIG BROTHER TWIST COMING UP THIS WEEK AND THE COUPLES WILL LIKELY BE BROKEN DOWN TO PLAY AS SINGLES. IF YOU HAVEN'T WATCHED THE SHOW THIS SEASON, JUST SKIP OVER ALL THIS BECAUSE YOU CLEARLY HAVE NO CLUE WHAT I AM TALKING ABOUT RIGHT NOW.

THE BIG RUMOR IS THAT ONE OR TWO OF THE ALREADY EVICTED HOUSEGUESTS THIS SEASON WILL BE VOTED BACK IN BY AMERICA AFTER TUESDAY'S SHOW AND WILL RE-ENTER THE GAME ON WEDNESDAY NIGHT. IF THIS IS THE CASE (THIS BETTER BE THE CASE!) THEN MY ALEX IS IN LIKE FLYNN BECAUSE AMERICA LOVES HIM. NOT AS MUCH AS I LOVE HIM OF COURSE, BUT THEY DO LOVE HIM.

WHILE I AM AT IT, I SHOULD MENTION MY OTHER TWO FAVORITE MALE REALITY SHOW CONTESTANTS OF ALL TIME. BECAUSE I KNOW YOU ARE ALL JUST ABSOLUTELY DYING TO KNOW.

ALSO FROM BIG BROTHER, SEASON 6 AND ALL-STARS SEASON 7, I PRESENT TO YOU KAYSAR RIDHA...

I FREAKING LOVE HIM.

AND LAST BUT NOWHERE NEAR LEAST WE HAVE SURVIVOR'S MAIN MAN OZZY. HE IS THE BEST PHYSICAL PLAYER TO EVER PLAY THIS GAME. HE CAME IN 2nd ON THE COOK ISLANDS SEASON AND THANK GOD IS BACK ON THE CURRENT SEASON JUST KICKING ASS AND TAKING NAMES.

HE IS SO THE HIGHLIGHT OF MY THURSDAYS!!

ONTO MY LAST TOPIC OF DISCUSSION IN THIS RIDICULOUS POST ABOUT PEOPLE I DON'T AND NEVER WILL KNOW, I WOULD LIKE TO MENTION AMERICAN IDOL.

WE ALREADY HAVE A WINNER HERE FOLKS...



AND HIS NAME IS DAVID ARCHULETA. SERIOUSLY HE IS ONLY 17. EVEN IF YOU DON'T WATCH AMERICAN IDOL YOU SHOULD CHECK OUT THE AMAZING CLIP ABOVE. IT'S TWO MINUTES OF GREATNESS...

BUT I'M ALSO PULLING FOR THESE GUYS IN THIS ORDER...

JASON CASTRO

MICHAEL JOHNS

AND DAVID HERNANDEZ

I ALSO LIKE CHEKEZIE EZE, BUT HE HAS APPARENTLY OPTED TO DROP HIS LAST NAME AND IS NOW JUST CHEKEZIE. I ABSOLUTELY CANNOT STAND IT WHEN PEOPLE ON IDOL CHANGE THEIR NAME IN THE MIDDLE OF THE SHOW OR DROP THEIR LAST NAME ALTOGETHER. UNLESS YOU ARE BONO, MADONNA OR PRINCE, KEEP YOUR NAME AS IS PLEASE.

I ONLY LIKE TWO OF THE GIRLS. THE REST I JUST DON'T GET. AND ONE OF THE TWO GIRLS I LIKED WAS ELIMINATED IN A COMPLETELY SHOCKING TURN OF EVENTS THIS WEEK...

HER NAME IS ALAINA WHITAKER

THE OTHER ONE I LIKE IS BROOKE WHITE. SHE SHOULD BE AROUND FOR QUITE AWHILE.

IF YOU ARE AN AMERICAN IDOL VIEWER, AND ESPECIALLY IF YOU ARE A VOTER... FOR THE LOVE OF GOD PLEASE REMEMBER SANJAYA MALAKAR!!!



DO YOU NOT SEE THE SECOND COMING OF SANJAYA??? DEAR LORD PLEASE VOTE THIS DANNY NORIEGA KID OFF THIS SHOW IMMEDIATELY. I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE. I REALLY CAN'T. IT'S LIKE HAVING FLASHBACKS EVERYTIME I SEE HIM. LAST YEAR WE WERE AT A PATIO BAR NOT EVEN WATCHING THAT WEEKS' IDOL RESULTS, AND SOMEBODY CAME OUTSIDE AND SAID SANJAYA HAD GOTTEN THE BOOT, AND PEOPLE WERE HIGH-FIVING. IT WAS CRAZY AND THE NEXT THING I KNEW WE ALL GOT A FREE SHOT FROM AN OLDER MAN SITTING AT THE BAR TO TOAST SANJAYA'S DEPARTURE. WHILE FUN THEN, I CAN TAKE NO MORE OF HIS REINCARNATE DANNY...

AS FOR IDOL SCANDALS, THOSE RACY PICS OF THAT TINY PHILLIPINO GIRL THIS YEAR ARE NO BIG DEAL IN CONTRAST TO THESE...

ROCK AND ROLL NURSE WHO ISN'T EVEN GOOD ON THIS SHOW HAS A PREVIOUSLY UNKNOWN DUI RAPSHEET...

AND OH-SO-RECENTLY-OUSTED ROBBIE CARRICO, YOU KNOW THE RESIDENT "ROCKER" WITH THE LONG BLONDE HAIR, HAS BEEN BUSTED FOR WEARING A WIG AS TO PRETEND HIS HAIR IS INDEED "ROCKER-LIKE LONG". WHO CARES IF THIS IS TRUE REALLY. IT'S FUNNY TO TALK ABOUT REGARDLESS...

SO THAT JUST ABOUT CLOSES OUT MY RANDOM CELEBRITY POST FOR THE DAY. BUT BEFORE I GO, I MUST ANNOUNCE THAT JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE WILL BE IN A MOVIE THIS SUMMER CALLED "THE LOVE GURU"...



AND SOLELY BECAUSE OF THIS SHOT, I WILL BE SEEING THIS MOVIE THE DAMN SECOND IT COMES OUT.

HAPPY LEAP YEAR FOLKS!!
XOXO,
BAXTER

INSIGNIFICANT RAMBLINGS...

OMG… LADIES AND GENTS PUHLEEZE BRACE YOURSELVES FOR THIS. IT IS A BIT TRAUMATIC.



OH NO SHE DIDN’T. KATHERINE, A HAIRCUT IS FINE, BUT ALL THIS HAIRSPRAY AND TEASING IS WAY OVER THE TOP!! I AM AT A TOTAL LOSS FOR WORDS…

BUT ONLY FOR A SECOND OF COURSE.

THE WRITERS STRIKE IS OVER!!! THE WRITERS STRIKE IS OVER!!! I DON’T CARE WHO, WHAT, WHEN OR HOW, BUT SOMEBODY BETTER GET BACK TO PRODUCTION ON GREY’S ANATOMY AND ENTOURAGE STAT!!!! AND THAT IS A DIRECT ORDER!

OKAY, SO I AM SURE YOU HAVE ALL HEARD THAT ANOTHER HILTON FAMILY MEMBER HAS NOW GOTTEN A DUI. I PRESENT TO YOU… BARRON HILTON.



18 YEAR OLD YOUNGER BROTHER OF PARIS AND NICKY. AND INSTEAD OF BAILING BARRON OUT, OR BEING BY HIS SIDE IN HIS TIME OF NEED, REFORMED-JAIL-BIRD-PARIS (HA!!) WAS TOO BUSY HOSTING A PARTY IN VEGAS FOR HER FELLOW ATTENTION-WHORE FRIEND KRISTIN CAVALLERI.

SEE, I HATED KRISTIN DURING LAGUNA BEACH BUT STILL THOUGHT SHE WAS FUNNY. BUT THEN SHE BECAME MUCH MORE LIKABLE THE MORE SHE SEEMED LIKE SHE WANTED TO BE NORMAL. SHE WAS OFF OF TMZ, OUT OF THE LIMELIGHT AND SEEMINGLY HAPPY. WELL I’LL BE DAMNED IF THE OLD KRISTIN SUDDENLY AND WITHOUT NOTICE CAME OUT OF HIDING AND HAS BEEN FULL-TIME-ATTENTION-WHORING-IT EVER SINCE. I AM NOT QUITE SURE WHY, BUT SHE IS NOWHERE NEAR AS CUTE AS SHE USED TO BE AND LAUREN HAS HER BEAT BY A MILE… AND THEN SOME. PLUS THIS BEHAVIOR PUTS HER RIGHT THERE ON THE LEVEL OF ALL THE OTHER GIRLS WHO PARTY ALL THE TIME, AND ARE FAMOUS JUST FOR BEING FAMOUS AND NOTHING ELSE. I CAN OFFICIALLY SAY I MIGHT HATE HER. IT’S JUST A “MIGHT” PEOPLE, NOT AN ACTUAL HATE.

SPEAKING OF ATTENTION-WHORES, SHOULDN’T LINDSAY QUIT CLUBBING EVERY NIGHT AND DO MOVIE OR SOMETHING?? ALSO, ANYBODY ELSE NOTICE THAT SOMETHING HAS GONE AWRY WITH HER FACE LATELY???



CAUSE I’M ONE TO TALK!!

ALSO, IS IT JUST ME OR IS RUMOR WILLIS EXTREMELY UNATTRACTIVE.

LIKE EXTREMELY…



BECAUSE AGAIN, I’M ONE TO TALK.

HEIDI MONTAG IS REALLY UPSET OVER THE NEGATIVE COMMENTS MADE ABOUT HER RECENT MUSIC VIDEO...

WONDER WHY???


ALSO, IT’S BEEN REPORTED THAT MILEY CYRUS IS REALLY DRUNK IN THIS PICTURE???? SAY IT AIN’T SO!!! YOU DECIDE.



MOVING ON, IN BIG BROTHER SPOILER NEWS, AS EVERYONE SAW LAST NIGHT MY NEW FAVORITE COUPLE GOT HEAD OF HOUSEHOLD. WHAT YOU DIDN’T SEE IS THE TWO COUPLES THEY NOMINATED ALREADY, AND THIS IS A NOMINATION I TRULY LOVE. THE ONY ONE I LIKE OF THE FOUR NOW NOMINATED PLAYERS IS HIM, AND I THINK HE'LL STICK AROUND. ALSO, ONE OF THE HOUSEGUESTS WENT HOME FOR A “PERSONAL” REASON, AND THEIR PARTNER GOT TO CHOOSE A REPLACEMENT. HOORAY BECAUSE THEY CHOSE WISELY AND ARE NOW MY SECOND FAVORITE COUPLE. I HOPE THESE FOUR MAKE IT TO THE END!! MAYBE IT’S NOT GOING TO BE SUCH A BAD SEASON AFTER ALL :-)

I WAS A BIT DISAPPOINTED WITH AMERICAN IDOL BECAUSE TWO OF THE GUYS I WAS ROOTING FOR SHOCKINGLY DID NOT MAKE THE CUT. FIRST WE HAVE OUR RESIDENT MORRISTOWN FRIEND, JOSIAH LEMING…



WHO IS PROBABLY LIVING IN HIS CAR IN YOUR NEIGHBORHOOD AS WE SPEAK.

BUT THEN, IN EVEN SADDER NEWS WE HAVE OUR PRECIOUS KYLE ENSLEY. I REALLY LIKED HIM AND AM BAFFLED THAT COLTON GOT THE SPOT OVER HIM. I THOUGHT HE HAD IT IN THE BAG. AND SIMON WAS PISSED!!!



I WON’T EVEN BOTHER POSTING A PICTURE OF COLTON BECAUSE HE AINT GOING NOWHERE IN THIS COMPETITION.

IN MUCH MORE POSITIVE NEWS, I WAS THRILLED THAT CARDIN DIDN’T MAKE IT!! CALL ME SELFISH (BECAUSE I AM, BUT WHATEVER…) BUT EVERYONE THAT KNOWS ME WELL IS 100% KNOWLEDGABLE THAT IF I EVER BIRTH MY OWN CHILD, HER NAME (YES, SHE WILL BE A SHE, I HAVE ALREADY DECIDED) WILL BE CARDEN. I CHOSE THIS NAME WHEN I WAS 24-ISH, COURTESY OF A FABULOUS BFF NAMED AMY. HOW DARE SOME RANDOM GIRL WITH THE SAME NAME COME IN AND CAUSE OTHER PEOPLE TO HEAR IT AND SUDDENLY DECIDE TO NAME THEIR CHILD THE SAME!! THERE WILL BE NO BABY-NAME-STEALING ON MY WATCH PEOPLE. I AM OFFICIALLY CALLING CARDEN. IT’S MINE. NOBODY ELSE CAN HAVE IT. I AM ALSO CALLING BLAKELY, BY THE WAY, FOR MY FUTURE SON. COURTESY OF MY KELS OF COURSE. ALL OTHER NAMES ARE UP FOR GRABS SO HAVE AT IT. JUST REMEMBER THE RULES PEOPLE.

WHILE I AM REMINDED ON THIS MOST HORRIBLE OF HOLIDAYS THAT I MIGHT DIE ALONE, I WOULD LIKE TO NAME MY PROBABLY NOT GONNA HAPPEN FUTURE CHILDREN CARDEN AND BLAKELY. DON’T STEAL MY DREAM PEOPLE. PRETTY PLEASE :-)

ALSO, THE ONLY PERSON WHO SENDS ME ANYTHING ON VALENTINES DAY IS IN VEGAS, WITH MY MOTHER. SO THAT SUCKS. I REALLY LOATHE THIS HOLIDAY. I REMEMBER NOT HATING IT SO MUCH UNTIL I WALKED INTO MY CLEMENT HALL FRESHMAN DORM LOBBY AFTER AN 8AM CLASS AT UT TO FIND A DAMN BOTANICAL GARDEN GOING ON IN THERE. GIRLS WERE SHRIEKING, CRYING, FALLING ALL OVER THEMSELVES TO GET TO THEIR 55 BOUQUETS OF ROSES AND I GOT NOTHIN. WELL, SCOOTER BROUGHT ME & CARDEN FLOWERS AND THEN GOT US DRUNK SO THAT WAS FUN, BUT I THINK HE JUST FELT SORRY FOR US, OR JUST FOR ME TO SPECIFY. BUT IT WAS THEN I DECIDED THAT THIS HOLIDAY WAS MORE OF A HELLIDAY FOR ME. ALL THE SAPPINESS JUST KILLS ME. I KNOW MANY OF YOU LOVE THIS DAY OF LOVE AND I AM VERY HAPPY FOR YOU ABOUT THAT. I JUST NEVER REALLY HAD A GOOD ONE. AND I AM A BITTER BITCH. BUT YOU KNEW THAT ALREADY.

MOVING ON AND BACK TO MY PREVIOUS TOPIC, I PROMISED THEM, AND HERE THEY ARE!!! MY AMERICAN IDOL PREDICTIONS. WOO-HOO, WHO’S EXCITED!! OKAY, WELL THEN JUST PRETEND YOU ARE FOR MY SAKE PLEASE.

IF YOU MUST, HERE IS A LINK TO THE ENTIRE TOP 24...

ALRIGHTY, I THINK IT IS FAIR TO SAY THAT THERE IS MUCH MORE TALENT WITH THE BOYS THAN THE GIRLS THIS YEAR. I COULD REALLY ONLY COME UP WITH 6 GIRLS OUT OF THE 12 WHO I THOUGHT MIGHT MAKE IT TO THE TOP 12.

AND THEY ARE (IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER):

Asia’h Epperson



Joanna Borgella



Amanda Overmyer



Syesha Mercado



Carly Smithson



Brooke White



THE ONLY ONES WHO MIGHT HAVE AN OUTSIDE SHOT WOULD BE:

Kristy Lee Cook



WHO I MIGHT HAVE PULLED FOR BEFORE HER HOOCHIE DANCING LAST NIGHT.

AND Kady Malloy



THE BOYS AREN’T SO EASY…

I HAD A REALLY TOUGH TIME COMING UP WITH MY TOP SIX, ESPECIALLY WHEN I SAW A FEW OF THEM MAKE THE CUT THAT I HAD NEVER SEEN BEFORE. AND THEY LOOKED INTERESTING. SINCE I HAVEN’T HEARD THEM SING YET, I THREW A FEW OF THEM INTO THE MIX AND HAVE A TOP
10 INSTEAD. BLAME AMERICAN IDOL FOR MY INABILITY TO NARROW THIS ANY FURTHER. AFTER THEY SING, I ENSURE A TOP 6 PREDICTION YOU INDEED WILL HAVE.

IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER… EXCEPT THAT I LOVE THE FIRST 6, HERE ARE THE GENTS.

David Archuleta



David Cook



Chikezie Eze



David Hernandez



Michael Johns



Robbie Carrico



Jason Castro



Luke Menard



Jason Yeager



Danny Noriega



UNLESS I’VE GOT MORE GOSSIP OR BITCHING ABOUT THIS SINGLE AWARENESS DAY GOING ON I AM DONE WITH MY RANT.

I DO HAVE A DATE TONIGHT WITH DRUNKENESS. ALWAYS A PLUS. AS MUCH AS I DESPISE THIS DAY, I DO LOVE YOU ALL!! ESPECIALLY MY GIRLS OUT THERE (YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHO YOU ARE DARLINGS!!) AND DO VERY MUCH HOPE THAT EVERYONE HAS A GREAT AND SIGNIFICANTLY BETTER DAY THAN I ALREADY KNOW MINE WILL BE.


LOVE YOU!!!
BAX